As you may recall — because I know you hang on my every word, and you certainly keep track of which one of us Critique-rs is critiquing — I had a jones for my Maybelline Illegal Lengths mascara and then they ripped it away from me. Because there is a whole Annoy June division at the Maybelline offices.
Since then, I have been on a quest, a vision quest, an I-want-my-vision-to-be-compromised-by-my-terribly-long-lashes quest, to find a suitable replacement.
A few months back, I spent the big bucks on Sephora brand mascara, and eh. Not so much.
So, recently I was at Target, because I just moved and for some reason when one moves, one can spend 800 days a week at Target. You can get juice glasses and SOS pads there. You can buy tiki candles for your new back yard, or Mother’s Day cards. I mean, Target is like Google. How did we live without it?
At any rate, I decided to try yet another mascara. This time I shelled out $7.39 on Cover Girl LashExact mascara. Its claim to fame is that you get clump-free, beautifully defined lashes. Cause that matters. I’m sure anyone can see how clearly clump-free my lashes are behind these SEVEN-FOOT-THICK GLASSES I HAVE TO WEAR!
Bitter much because I can’t have Lasik?
It appears that Cover Girl is tossing out all sorts of new mascaras, in groovy new containers. There is the ultra-hip orange tube of LashBlast, which I don’t know if that means your lashes are going to pull you forcefully into space or if your lashes are going to keep you up all night partayyin’ and singing how the roof, the roof, the roof is on fire. Hang on. Let me look at Cover Girl’s website…
Oh, okay, LashBlast volumizes each lash. Sure.
Then they are also touting their Queen mascara, which I don’t know if Freddie Mercury used it, or Queen Elizabeth, or what.
But for me, I went for the purple tube of LashExact. It comes in regular and waterproof, but I shy away from waterproof. I do not cry much. I have no feelings.
The mascara comes in four shades: brown, brown-black, black, and very black. I always use black, because I read somewhere that everyone should. And I believe everything I read. Did you know Bill Gates is gonna give us all money?
I have to tell you, it is a little above the "eh" I gave my Sephora mascara. LashExact does seem to not clump, and if you put on three coats in quick succession, not allowing the coats to dry, it actually does a pretty good job of lengthening.
It is not my Illegal Lengths. What is, really? But so far in my quest, Cover Girl LashExact is the best substitute mascara I have found.
LashExact can be found at pretty much every drug store and beauty aisle at the grocery store because, hey, it’s Cover Girl. Cover Girl is ever-present.
About Jo-Lynne
Someday, June, short, stumpy eyelashes are gonna come into vogue. Trouble is, with our luck, we’ll be so old and hairy-all-over by then our eyebrows will be growing down over our eyes. I love your dedicated Maybelline division… Whirpool has a team just like it for me. And they are all Outstanding Employees, too.
June – you are going to love me (and OWE me) for the rest of your life!!
Go to:
http://www.buymebeauty.com
You’ll find your Maybelline Illegal Lengths mascara for $6.99!!!!!!!!!!!
I’m going to have to try your recommendation! I tried the Lash Blast and to put it mildly, I loathe it!!!!! Non-clumping my butt!!!
Ok, I just darted over to buymebeauty.com totally prepared to buy 6 tubes of the illegal lengths because it is my fave too — I started using it 9 years ago and would have stocked up for the rest of my life had I known they’d stop selling it but I digress…the brush on the illegal lengths they are selling there isn’t CURVED. And for me that was a huge part of it. Bummer. So June, if you buy it, I would love to read a review about it!
On a side note, I just bought two tubes (bonus buy in one pack) of Maybelline Volume Express mascara in very black — and the brush is curved and it’s pretty stinkin’ fantastic, I’ve gotta say.
It’s no Illegal Lengths, but it’s the next best thing that I’ve found — maybe worth checking out.